Last week I took you through how our skills and abilities are tied to Emotional Intelligence. I briefly explained the definition of EI by breaking up the 4 main components.
In this blog I will be giving you tips and exercises to practice that will enhance self-awareness, self-regulation, social awareness, and relationship management. in order to help improve your emotional intelligence.
I'd like to share two similar concepts that I use day to day and encourage my clients to use.
I have a couple of ways of expressing it, both are very similar:
1 - "Look at everything as a spectator"
2- "Put your "virtues of love" glasses on"
To "look at life as a spectator" means to observe or experience life from a detached or impartial perspective, similar to how a spectator watches a game or event from the sidelines. It implies adopting an objective viewpoint, rather than being directly involved or emotionally invested in the events unfolding. This mindset can involve stepping back from one's own experiences and emotions to gain a broader perspective, allowing for greater clarity, understanding, and acceptance of life's ups and downs.
In an other blog I will explain a more detailed explanation of "Put your "virtues of love" glasses on" and how to activate those "glasses" :-)
Here are some practical tips and exercises to help improve EI:
Self-awareness:
Keep a journal: Spend a few minutes each day reflecting on your emotions, thoughts, and experiences without judgement. Ask yourself probing questions to deepen your understanding of your emotions and reactions. Write down what you're feeling and why, as well as any patterns or triggers you notice.
Seek feedback: Ask trusted friends, family members, or colleagues for honest feedback about your strengths, weaknesses, and areas for improvement. Use this information to gain insight into how others perceive you.
Practice mindfulness: Engage in mindfulness exercises such as meditation, deep breathing, or body scans to cultivate greater self-awareness and presence in the moment.
2. Self-regulation:
Practice deep breathing exercises: To help manage stress and regulate your emotions try breathing in through your nose for 3 seconds then out through your mouth for 3. Next time you feel a strong emotion, pause and reflect, take a few deep breaths before responding to the situation. Consider the consequences of your actions and choose a response that aligns with your values and goals.
Develop healthy loving coping strategies: Identify healthy coping mechanisms that help you manage stress and regulate your emotions effectively. This could include exercise, spending time in nature, practicing relaxation techniques, or seeking support from others.
Set goals: Set realistic and achievable goals for yourself, both personally and professionally. Break larger goals down into smaller steps and celebrate your progress along the way. Remember to be gentle with yourself and show yourself grace if some goals aren't reached or reached past a "deadline" 3. Social awareness:
Practice empathy: Put yourself in others' shoes and try to understand their thoughts, feelings, and perspectives. Listen actively and attentively and validate their emotions without interrupting or judging. This may be difficult, but remember that we are all trying to be good people, not easy for some because of our traumas and bad experiences. We all have them.
Observe nonverbal cues: Take a walk in a busy public place and observe the interactions between people. Pay attention to people's body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice to better understand their emotional state. Practice empathy and sensitivity in your interactions with others. Remember to use your "Look at everything as a spectator" or "Put your "virtues of love" glasses on".
Cultivate curiosity: Approach social situations with a genuine curiosity about others. Ask open-ended questions, show interest in their experiences, and be willing to learn from different perspectives. 4. Relationship management:
Communicate effectively: Practice active listening, assertiveness, and clarity in your communication with others. Be open and honest about your thoughts and feelings, and encourage others to do the same. Being authentic and Vulnerable will be in a later blog.
Resolve conflicts constructively: Approach conflicts with a focus on finding mutually beneficial solutions rather than assigning blame or escalating tensions. Use empathy and active listening to understand the other person's perspective and work towards resolution.
Build rapport: Invest time and effort in building positive relationships with others. Show appreciation, offer support, and demonstrate trustworthiness to foster a sense of connection and collaboration.
Practicing these tips and exercises is crucial for enhancing emotional intelligence because it fosters greater self-awareness, self-regulation, social awareness, and relationship management.
By developing these skills, as individuals, we can better understand and manage our own emotions, navigate social interactions more effectively, and build stronger and more fulfilling relationships.
Incorporating these practices into our daily life can lead to improved mental and emotional well-being, increased resilience in the face of challenges, and enhanced overall quality of life.
Remember that building EI is a journey, and it requires patience, self-reflection, self-love and ongoing practice. These will empower you to take control of your emotional intelligence and cultivate a more balanced and fulfilling existence.
Peace and harmony,
France